dreams & a kiss from a scorpion

I have this issue (for lack of a better word) with dreams.

The first part of this is that I believe that dreams are meant to tell you something. And I feel that, at least in my life, if those messages are not addressed, the dreams will plague you. I have battled recurring dreams for awhile. I had two epic experiences with recurring dreams. I say epic because they rattled me, and they did not go away until I figured out what they meant and what I needed to do to address the issue.

The second thing is that for some odd reason I dream music. Sometimes there are songs along with my dreams, but other times, I just literally dream the music. I don’t know if anyone else experiences that, but I’ve never talked to anyone who says they do.

All of that being said, this really has to do with neither of those.

When I left my job and cleaned out my office, I brought with me this crystallized scorpion that an intern had given me. I had kept it on my desk for luck at work. When I brought it home, it spent some time on my nightstand, and a couple of weeks ago I put it next to my door so I could see it as I exit each day. Then, a few weeks ago, I went hiking with some friends and the topic of scorpions came up. The end result of the conversation was that I said I considered them to be good luck.

I have already detailed my scorpion adventures from last night/early this morning, but what I didn’t refer to was my thought last night that I was about to be kissed by a scorpion. The funny thing is that they really don’t creep me out.

At any rate, (and this post is getting messier, I know) there’s a scene from the movie La Bamba that always sticks out in my head. Bob takes his younger brother Ritchie into Mexico to see some sort of healer, who skins a rattlesnake and gives it to Ritchie to eat. It served to be one of those centering trips. So, that has also been in my head as of late. It came into my head last weekend when I battled a horrid migraine, and I thought to myself that without health insurance, I’d really prefer to go to Mexico and see a shaman. I figured that a more holistic approach at this point might be more helpful to my overall well-being.

All of these things have been in my head for the past week as I have worked (or not worked) at sorting out some situations.

Last night, I fell into a very deep sleep. And it was a swirl of vivid dreams. They were completely vivid in color. It was almost as though the skies were extra blue and the deserts extra deep. It was a journey, and I feel that it lasted the entire length of my sleep although that is likely not true. Huts and shamans and scorpions and border crossings and the poncho that is in the picture I keep next to my bed. There was no end destination. It was just movement. Honestly, in the dream I was completely at peace. It didn’t end with me waking up alarmed or feeling that I was lost.

It was almost therapeutic. As though I had traveled through something and come out with a lot more clarity. The thing is I couldn’t tell you any specific thing that is more clear, but today is the first day that I haven’t dipped into that mental area of feeling that I might possibly be in over my head.

I woke up easily, and I realized I was drenched in sweat. I literally woke up in a daze, as though I had truly traveled through the desert and woke up to find myself at the end of the journey. It was initially somewhat alarming, but I realized that perhaps it was the physical cleansing that accompanied an odd, surreal mental cleansing.

I appreciate my dreams. It’s funny because during my waking hours, I practice meditation and clear my head of all thoughts. And sometimes, at some points in my life, in my sleeping hours, these dreams awake thoughts from a deep subconscious. I have learned to listen to both because I know they both have a place in my happiness.


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