Okay, I can say it now.
So, I walk down to my mailbox at work to find that every teacher has received a box of paperclips. I know this sounds really stupid, but you kind of have to beg for supplies so it’s a big deal when you’ve been out of paperclips for a couple of weeks and refuse to buy your own.
I saw the first two rows of mailboxes first and noticed the paperclips. Then, my eyes went down to my box and amazingly there was a lack of paperclips in my mailbox. My friend stormed over to her box to find the same noticeable lack of paperclips.
I will cut out the middle of this story, but I will say that it was not a pretty scene. And I have dumped all my paperclips out of the box (that I procured somehow) and I fully intend to leave the duct-taped empty box of paperclips in my box from now until the end of the year.
This little incident genuinely sent me into a tailspin, and I’m actually quite embarrassed. At the same time, I took it as a sign that something seriously needs to change. Inside me. So, I’m working on that.
I am so grateful, though, to everyone who agreed with me that it was a big deal, everyone who laughed, and this bit of insight from last night: If you’re going to have a nervous breakdown, you want to have it over something like paperclips. You don’t want to have it over something where you’re genuinely in danger and really need to react. (I’m badly paraphrasing.)
And I realized two things—-
1. I’ve officially been pushed to the edge of where I’m comfortable existing.
2. I have some f-ing amazing people in my life.