the second conversation

Me: I’m really disappointed in  myself because I drove past BevMo at least seven times last week, and I never picked up that blueberry ale.

Mom: You’re going to go nuts in a place like that.

Me: I don’t think so. I haven’t been drinking really. I can’t drink and run this much.

Mom: Well, you know you should always keep a supply of liquor.

Me: For what?

Mom: To clean wounds.

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