My knee is bruised in four places.

I didn’t even know it except it hurt all day to walk on. Then, I thought I should take a look at see what the problem was. Bruises. I didn’t even cry because of the pain. I cried out of sheer frustration. I’m upset because running is the one thing I do every day that clears my mind, and I really need that right now. But I’m also upset because I truly believe it is the physical manifestation of something plaguing my soul right now, which really means I need a shaman.

I’m tired of people lying to me.

And I’m even more tired of people trying to “comfort” me by saying that the liars have a weakness. Lying to a person is a lack of respect for that person’s humanity. And unless I’ve done something to deserve it, I’m tired of it. I’m trying to work through this, but I can’t. Which is probably why my knee is bruised and doubly why I need a shaman.

F—ing frustrated.